My advice to singles in the dating world....

           As a newly happily married man I feel that I owe it to society to reveal what little knowledge I posses about dating before the memories of living the single life fade off into oblivion. I'll be the first to admit that I never really had "game" and was never much of a charming womanizer. Those two skills take way too much effort and would stand in direct contradiction with my personality. What I do know is how to survive in the single world. The single world is a flaky unreliable place and if you are not careful can lead you down many frustrating paths that end in a colossal waste of time. My strategy for avoiding the pitfalls can be summed up in 3 words: "The Lunch Date."  Never go out with a person for the first time unless you have been on a lunch date first. The Lunch Date prerequisite advantages are vast and I examine them in the paragraphs below.

note: This advice is meant for working adults that are probably age 25 and older, not for partying teens or college kids in their early 20's that have a lot of social opportunities.

 

Advantages to the Lunch Date

• Don't risk your nights & weekends on a date that may be a disaster

If you have never had a woman "change plans" on you chances are you haven't dated many. Let's face the facts, most attractive women have options and if something comes up that she thinks is more enjoyable than plans with you she may leave you high and dry. Then there is always the chance that your date sucks and is not fun at all; either way you have wasted a night or weekend that you could be doing something else. If you get stood up or waste a lunch break, who cares? It's just lunch!

• It's a lot easier to entertain/impress someone for 45 minutes rather than 3 hours

It will only take you a few minutes into a date to realize that the ambient lighting at the Electric Cowboy was very deceiving and the bubbly blonde you thought was so interesting was just drunk. And lets not forgot the most modern example of false advertising; the five year old profile pic that looks quite different from the specimen in front of you. You shouldn't be condemned to spending the entire night with this person. Chances are you know within 10 minutes or less if you have any desire to see this person again. On the bright side, if you happen to be in a situation with a person that you do like you only have to make a good impression. I know I personally can't go three hours without doing something dumb or repulsive. That's why advertisers show movie trailers instead of behind the scenes.

• A timed lunch date prevents an awkward ending

A lunch date has a preset beginning and end. There is no mystery or option as to where the date will lead because you have to get back to work; therefore there's no pressure to extend the date. You don't have to worry about hurting someone's feelings. No pressure on the guy to end the date with an awkward kiss and no pressure on the woman to hang around longer than she wants to because the guy just spent $80 on dinner.

• A lunch date saves money

Lunch dates are like job interviews. A fancy dinner date is more like part of the job description once you get the job. This issue goes much deeper than just saving money. The restaurant you choose to take a dinner date will immediately be picked apart and examined. Does money spent equal how much you like them? Is this girl just using me for a free dinner? These questions are never explored in a lunch date because lunch dates are casual, inexpensive and you can tell much more about a person during a casual encounter which is the entire purpose of the first date.

• You can go on more dates and meet more people

A few of those boring 3 hour $80 dates and you could easily become jaded and uncomfortable in the dating world. When you go on a lunch date, your not really investing much so you really don't have much to lose. It's like speed dating in slow motion. I can honestly say that I've been on enough lunch dates to have went out with people I never seen again, met people who became friends and even made a wife out of one!

• You don't have to wait on women to get ready

Since the lunch date takes place in the middle of the day this will drastically reduce the waiting time that us males endure to accommodate the slower species. This also eliminates the date pick-up that can be quite time consuming. As a wise women once said "Ain't nobody got time fah that"

• Find out if someone is interested without over committing

If someone doesn't have time to spend their lunch with you, they aren't interested. No need in investing any more time or effort. If someone doesn't text you or message you after a lunch date...they aren't interested. The conversations you have after the lunch date will let you know where you stand. Its that simple.

• Lunch dates are always sober (or should be)

Most people aren't drunk by lunch so it's a good time to make a good assessment, which may be completely different from when you originally met this person if it was in the confines of an adult social setting.

                                                                  Conclusion


In the flaky world of shady ladies and outlaw gentlemen the lunch date is a dating loophole that nobody can defend. It allows the man to pursue without chasing. It gives a person a venue to show interest without investment. But most of all it minimalizes the pitfalls that discourage someone from meeting new people. My friend Weird Alfred said it best:

 

"Don't ask 'em for dinner or breakfast or brunch 'Cause girls, they wanna have lunch"